This week was tough. It was spiritually amazing, but mentally exhausting.
Ever since our last transfer, Sister Olsen and I have been quite aware of the miracles that happen every day. I would have to say my favorite Wunder this week happened on Saturday. We had just gotten out of an eating appointment and I was not feeling good at all. I was emotionally and physically struggling and I literally did not know if I could continue with our day.
Our day had a pretty iffy start. We started with going out finding early in the morning and that went really well. At some point after that I had to call some Elders in our mission to talk about a person we are working with. I have been doing some translations for them and a couple nights ago I was speaking to the man's wife and found out his drinking has continued. After speaking together we realized his addiction is greatly affecting him. That phone call in itself was tough. From there, we headed to our eating appointment with an elderly lady in our ward. My goodness, getting there was so stressful. Not only are the Saturday schedules weird for buses and trams, but there was also a Dynamo game going on, and there was construction at one of the stops. In short, we didn't know where we could catch any of the buses or trams we needed. Our phone was only giving us options that would get us there 30 minutes late. We literally didn't know what to do. All of the sudden, the Holy Ghost reminded me of a tram stop by this lady's house and we were able to get on a tram and get to our appointment with only being 5 minutes late.
We get to our appointment and all is going well. Then, we asked her about her family and she started suddenly crying and told us not to bring it up again. Sister Olsen and I looked at each other and we didn't know what was going on or what we could do. We were done with our potato soup, and she got up to fill our bowls with more soup. We looked at each other with the same response as the first time. Somehow we finished eating and we started sharing Elder Bednar's general conference talk about meekness. I was bearing testament of Christ's healing powers when she bursted out crying. She started laying out all of the problems going on in her life right now, for years. My heart just continued to break. We bore testament of Jesus being the Christ. As we were leaving, she teared up again and thanked us for helping her not feel alone for the day. As we were walking out, I just wanted to break down. I do not know how, but we both agreed that we left and had taken away her pain with us.
My appreciation for the atonement of Jesus Christ and my love for my mission has changed. Do not get me wrong, I have loved my mission since arriving in Germany and I have an understanding of the atonement, but both have grown drastically just within this week.
As I ponder on the experiences I have had this week and as I reflect on the life I left behind, I know without a doubt that there is a God. I know at times it seems like he is not there, like he has abandoned you. But I know that is not true. I know he is always with you because he has always been with me. I know that regardless of what you feel, there is someone who has felt it all. And he is Jesus Christ. I know he literally took upon himself the infirmities and afflictions of everyone so we never have to feel alone. He will take away the sorrow, illnesses, sins. He will make things perfect. And for that I am thankful.
Later on that day, we went finding again. We ended up in a random town and we weren't sure why we were there. We set out to talk to everyone, and as we were walking I realized we were right by where a couple in our ward lives. We have been trying to get in contact with them for the longest time. It occurred to me that perhaps we were not in the area to find someone but for this couple. I asked Sister Olsen where we should go and after a while she brought up the couple I had thought of. We went and klingeled twice and got no answer. Sister Olsen strongly felt we needed to klingel again. We were both reluctant but we went forward anyway. They answered us.
I know God lives. I know he guides us daily and picks us up when we can no longer walk on our own.